Meet the Four Gremlins of the Perfectionism Crash Loop
Ant on a climber plant by SuriyaKK from Getty Images.
Making mountains out of ant mills
I’m sparing you the image, but an “ant death spiral” or “ant mill” is when a group of army ants lose their scent trail, get separated from their main colony, and begin to follow each other in a never-ending loop until they die of exhaustion.
I’ve written about ANTs before. Which makes the ANT mill a horrifically apt metaphor for the thinking loops that derail us from our paths and lead to burnout.
There’s a familiar pattern to this cycle; I call it the Perfectionism Crash Loop. Mine goes like this:
Perfectionism – Imagining what could be, I set an unnecessarily high expectation for myself.
Procrastination – Overwhelmed by the prospect of what’s ahead, I wait. Instead, I spend time mentally preparing myself or over-researching until I feel “ready”.
Overfunctioning – As the deadline looms closer and pressure mounts, I switch gears and power through in a burst of unsustainable effort.
Confidence Crash – Exhausted and looking back on it all, I question how I got to this point, and I recommit to something new, determined to “do better” the next time.
And because of that unease and expectation to prove a better outcome, it all starts again.
I’ve come to recognize this loop in myself — and in others I coach — as a kind of closed system of self-doubt. It’s led by four thought gremlins (of the internal apocalypse):
Meet the Perfectionism Gremlin
“This needs to be better than what I’ve done before. It needs to matter, be polished, feel impressive.”
This is the gremlin that insists on impossibly high standards. It convinces you that anything less than great is a waste of time. It’s usually trying to protect you from judgment, but ironically, it traps you in it.
Next: the Procrastination Gremlin
“It’s too much. I can’t even start.”
Overwhelmed by the scope of the task, this one pulls you into the vortex of avoidance. You scroll. You tidy. You start a new doc titled “IMPORTANT FINAL FINAL REAL THIS TIME.” And do nothing.
🚫 Warning: don’t feed the gremlins (especially after midnight)!
“Maybe I just need to research a little more…”
Cue procrasti-learning. Also known as: the illusion of progress. This is where you feed the gremlins with endless tabs, reels, and videos to consume. Exactly when? Who cares! You’re collecting relevant material! You’ll learn important things that will be helpful for the work, right? Right?
In sum, you’re moving, but not forward.
Enter: the Overfunctioning Gremlin
“What? The deadline’s tomorrow? LET'S GOOOOOooooo…”
This gremlin lives–laughs–loves on pressure. And when it peaks, you snap into action.
But it’s unsustainable. You cram and crash and write a whole report in one sitting. Then wonder why you’re exhausted and vaguely resentful.
Finally: the Confidence Crash Gremlin
“That wasn’t real work. I didn’t actually do a good job.”
You finish…but feel no pride. Just a creeping sense that you got lucky this time. That if anyone really looked, they’d see the flaws. That it was all a bodge job.
This gremlin plants doubt, right when you need rest and reassurance.
Catching yourself in a loop
Right before my loop started over — before I used my insecurity to fuel yet another impossible standard — I noticed.
I noticed.
That’s the first win. I didn’t push through. I didn’t double down. I stepped away and did a puzzle for 15 minutes.
It sounds small, but in those circling moments, it’s massive. Interrupting the loop is everything.
So where do you start?
If you see yourself in this cycle, you might be wondering where to jump in and stage your intervention. Thankfully, there’s no wrong entry point.
Here are four ways to begin breaking the loop:
1. Start at the beginning (the outside observer’s approach)
Zoom out. What’s the actual expectation? Is it realistic? Who set it? Try to reframe the project, the goal, or your role in it. Even if you’re not entirely successful, the act of stepping back is major progress!
2. Start at the end (the belief-hacking approach)
Insecurity is fuelled by unchallenged beliefs. Work backwards. Ask: What am I making this mean about me?
3. Triage the biggest pain (the emergency room approach)
Where’s the discomfort loudest? The avoidance? The shame? Start there. Ease it first. Relief can bring clarity.
4. Pick the low-hanging fruit (the momentum builder)
Do something small, even if it’s unrelated. Close a tab. Write one sentence. Move. Taking easy action makes more, tougher progress possible.
You can break a loop anywhere
You don’t need to solve every stage of the loop at once; you may end up incorporating multiple approaches anyway.
The important thing is that you start somewhere. Working on one part of the loop will lessen the intensity of the others. It will make everything seem easier to overcome and the whole system will shift toward one that serves you better:
Break the perfectionism, and the procrastination eases.
Ease the overfunctioning, and those imposter voices lose volume.
Build awareness, and the whole loop gets lighter and easier to snap.
It’s not about breaking the loop once. It’s about building the habit of catching yourself inside of it and gently redirecting the energy. Putting in another rep to get back on the path.
These are small shifts that feel like actual progress. Each one is a win worth celebrating, even if both the victory and after party happen only in our heads. Because when we honour our successes — however small and uneventful they may seem to be — we make ourselves more likely to acknowledge what created those wins, and to use that info to do it again.
Parting thoughts on disrupting the mind’s mills
Only rarely does “success” look like launching the thing, shipping the project, delivering the report.
Most times, it looks like pausing when you’d normally push. It’s checking the map to make sure you’re still on the path. Or questioning a thought before it sends you in a spiral.
These are the small victories that keep you focused (and eventually lead you to the bigger ones). These are the wins along the way that help you actually feel the feelings you want to feel when you’re done: accomplishment, pride, contentment, success.
Also remember that motivation follows action, not the other way around. Start by taking a tiny, ant-sized step.
Want some help getting started?
Book your free 30-minute Discovery Call to make your first small step an easy win:
